Momma, Hold my hand

For me: first impressions are what I look into mostly. I think first impressions are powerful, either you trust them or you don't. 
In the past week, I met some one and immediately I fell in love with this person, not literally though. He was quite beautiful, not physically. We would make tiny jokes here and there, and once we started talking intensely, he had the power to make me trust him, the way I would trust some one for years and years, but he had black magic that made me want to foolishly lay out on the table. He was so fascinated, eager and almost manipulating. As I tell him everything without leaving any detail out. He gave me one of the best answers that I've never heard of or even believe of thinking of. He didn't give up trying to impress me or himself. He almost felt too comfortable, giving me advice and telling me what he would do in my shoes. He listened and I spoke. Then, I listened and he spoke. I wasn't best at giving my opinions like he would. I think he knew I wasn't as good as he was, yet he still trusted me with his secrets. But, I did the best I could. I told him, I write letters to myself and he said,"well write out your regular letters, and let me have it." 
Until this day, I've never seen him again, and I still haven't written a letter to him. I was so afraid to write for the first time. 

In the week, a close relative and I haven't completely had a full introduction BUT, finally met and sat down and talked. It was one of the best heart felt conversations, I've had and needed. I am telling you first impressions and communication are key when it comes to new faces. Anyways she and I had a conversation about both our families. I told her about my grandma and she told me the same thing about her parents. Hearing the same thing from other people such as, "you're growing up and young: your parents will understand," that same conversation is annoying once you've heard it a thousand times already but, for some reason when she was telling me the exact same story, it was different hearing it coming from her. She said, "You know you're absolutely   right, but what I'm saying is that you need to learn from right and wrong and stop yourself from the bad, and go with the good. When you're older no one will be there to hold your hand and cross the street and tell you which way to go, you need to hold yourself up and tell yourself where will you go and which way you choose to go. It's your choice." When she said that, all I thought about was my grandma and all the times she yelled at me in slow motion. One night, when I went out late, my grandma had a talk with me it wasn't about getting lectured it was about how much she loves me. She doesn't usually say things like that not even on the phone when we hang up. It opened my eyes how much a parents comment or compliment negative or positive changes how you feel overall, its a boost of energy kind of feeling. I've never been happier having a connection with my mama. She gives me strength and I hope I do for her.